So I had a rather unusual day, a long but interesting one, largely spent with friends. And I already wrote about how awesome having the right set of friends is, here.
Every now and again, when People, especially Friends, ask how I’m doing, my typical response ranges from “I’m doing fine, thank you” to “I’m doing great, God is faithful.” (And indeed, he is)….to everything in between, making my response as positive as possible.
There are times that response is spontaneous, almost automatic, because really at that time, I’m fine. There are other times my response is rather well-thought, because even though I may not be doing that fine, I still want the people to think I am. Well, because I don’t know if they really care enough to know the truth.
However, I have a friend in particular, who often asks a second time, “Are you really fine?” Ofcourse, don’t you want me to be? I retort. But then I go on to mention some of the challenges I might be facing at the time, and the conversation ends with me feeling somewhat relieved, because I’d shared with someone who really wanted to know.
So the question to you and me is this: WHY ASK? Do we care enough to want to know? Or do we just ask because courtesy demands it? What if we get some responses we are not prepared for? Why ask if we don’t want the answer(s)?
I had the opportunity of taking French classes in my first two years of secondary school, where I learnt the typical conversation:
Me: Bonjour, Mon ami, Comment ca va?
(Morning, my friend, how are you doing?)
Friend: Ca va bien, merci. Et vous?
(I’m alright, thanks. And you?)
Me: Très bien. (Great!).
PS: Well, that’s my own version of how the conversation goes anyway, I’m not sure of its accuracy.
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My point is, in our day to day conversations, there are too many generalized questions, which give rise to generalized answers, and eventually generalized assumptions and conclusions. Because our concerns are not genuine, the responses we get are not either.
A lot of folks are hurting inside, many are struggling, some people just want others who can identify with them, others are looking for answers to hard questions, we encounter them everyday.
The challenge before us is to go the extra-mile, to really care enough to want to know (without being busybodies), and to offer a helping hand, a word of encouragement, some prayers, listening ears or just shoulders to lean on, when we have to.
So Today, do more than ASK;
Thank you for reading!